May you and I live freely and comfortably for the rest of my life.
the method of Happiness says: "the most lasting pursuit in life is to live comfortably."
as I grow older, I gradually find that what I pursue all my hard life is for the comfort of life.
the most comfortable way to live the rest of your life is to have few expectations, a small temper, and a good state of mind.
that is to think that you have given, given enthusiasm and help to others, and expect others to treat yourself in the same way.
but the hearts of the people are unfathomable. Sometimes the greater our expectations of some people and things, the greater our disappointment.
I have seen netizens share their stories on Zhihu:
some time ago, my best friend needed money, and netizens lent it to each other without hesitation.
he believes that friends should be like this, and if they are in trouble, they need to help.
when his friend got the money, he was very grateful to him and said that he would help him if he was in trouble in the future.
because of the words of a friend, netizens think that this friend is very loyal and has no wrong people.
but what happened later got this netizen into trouble.
the netizen was in urgent need of money. He opened his mouth with his friend without thinking. He thought his friend would lend it to him immediately.
but unexpectedly, the other party did not reply to his message at all, which made him unable to let go for a long time.
this reminds me of a sentence I once saw on the Internet:
"most of the time, you think that as long as you are good to others, others will also be nice to you, but you forget that some people, no matter how kind you are to them, they are just perfunctory.
most of the time, what you think is sincere is just a hoax. "
in life, each of us is not this netizen, with too high expectations of others, thinking that if we give out our sincerity, others will also show our sincerity.
if you think about it carefully, it is often impossible for people to exchange their hearts at an equal price, and in the end, people can only rely on themselves.
instead of expecting others, it is better to improve yourself and rely on your own strength to achieve what you expect.
Zeng Guofan had a bad temper in his early years. During his term of office, he had disputes with many people and offended many people.
he once had a quarrel with two fellow villagers, and what he did was so trivial that many people dodged when they saw him, let alone dared to eat at the same table.
Zeng Guofan also reflected on himself many times.
until July of the eighth year of Xianfeng, the imperial court ordered him to re-serve in Jiangxi, and his change was surprising.
Hu Linyi, a good friend of Zeng Guofan, said: "after coming out of the mountain again, he slowly became mature and smooth."
it is precisely because Zeng Guofan reined in his temper in time, learned to treat others peacefully, and finally reached the pinnacle of his life.
people often say, "temper, it is instinct to take it out, but it is the ability to hold it down."
there are nine times out of ten bad things in life. The more easily you lose your temper, things will only get worse.
throughout ancient and modern times, the more capable people are, the more able they are to control their temper.
when you get along with others, you should have a small temper, so that you won't say hurtful words because you lose control of your emotions.
only by controlling one's temper can one control one's own life and make life more comfortable and happy.
have a good attitude
there is a saying in Daojing: "the wind does not end, and showers do not last all day."
A strong wind cannot blow a whole morning, nor can a rainstorm last a whole day. After the wind and rain, there is another blue sky.
the same is true of one's life, with ups and downs, and there are many unknown ups and downs ahead.
once read such a story:
two travelers were looking for an exit in the desert, but they had only half a bottle of water left.
one of them thought, what if there is only half a bottle of water in his hand, and the desert is so big that it is not enough?
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and another thought that fortunately he still had half a bottle of water and would hold on until he found an oasis.
the mindset of the two people is different, and the outcome is not hard to imagine.
the former quickly gave up and was allowed to be buried in yellow sand, while the latter finally walked out of the desert with a positive attitude.
everything has two sides. Although we can't change the development of things, we can choose to look at things from the perspective of things.
"things change with the heart, circumstances are created by the heart, and troubles are created by the heart."
to be a man, you must have a good state of mind.
if you have a good mindset, everything will go well; if you have a good mindset, life will be perfect everywhere.
in this life, if you expect less, you will be more happy.
the smaller the temper, the bigger the pattern;
have a better state of mind and have less trouble.
, may you and I live comfortably and comfortably for the rest of my life.